The Night Watch
by InTheEndWeThinkOfHowItBegan
Summary: When Tegan Quin joined the Army, she knew it wouldn't be easy. She knew there would be difficulties she would have to overcome. She didn't realize one those difficulties would be her immediate attraction to Captain Sara Clement. Tegan and Sara. Quincest/Quinlove AU
1. Chapter 1

Tegan Quin stood at attention, shoulder to shoulder with at least forty other Army recruits. They were standing outside of their barracks, and Tegan was squinting to keep the sun out of her eyes. A lieutenant was standing in front of their line, yelling something that Tegan wasn't paying attention to. He'd been yelling for almost ten minutes now, something about honor and hard work and commitment and how they'd be lucky if they made it through the next three weeks of training. All Tegan could think about, though, was when she was going to be able to actually do something besides talk to recruiters, sign papers, and get yelled at.

When Tegan decided to join the army, it was because she thought she was going to actually be doing something to help make a difference. She hadn't realized how long it would take to get to that point. Hell, it had taken six months to get to where she stood now, the first day of recruit training.

"Quin!" Hearing her name practically screamed jolted Tegan's thoughts to the present. It was the lieutenant that he shouted at her. He walked up to her, stopping about two inches from her face.

"Is there a problem, recruit?" he shouted, spraying spit onto her face.

Tegan blinked, try to maintain her composure. "No, sir!" she shouted back.

"Well, you damn well didn't seem to be paying much attention to anything I was just saying!" The lieutenant stood at least six inches taller than Tegan, and she had to try her very best not to cower under him.

"I'm sorry, sir!" she replied with a less vigor than the last time she spoke.

"How do you expect to succeed here if you can't pay attention, recruit?" Tegan wasn't sure if that was a question, so she remained silent.

"Drop and give me fifty, now!" he shouted. Tegan was in push up position before she had time to process it. She counted in her head, feeling herself tire faster than she normal would have thanks to the hot sun.

When she go to 30, she heard the shrill blow of a whistle and the lieutenant stopped shouting. By the time she got to 45, she heard a distinctly female voice above her.

"On your feet, recruit," the voice said firmly, not shouting like the lieutenant, but with an edge that was even more intimidating. Tegan jumped up and stood at attention, finding herself at eye level with the speaker. Tegan was shocked to find herself with one of the most beautiful, and yet most intimidating people that she had ever. Her hazel eyes bored into Tegan's, and her mouth was set in a firm line, showing her disapproval. Her chocolate brown hair was short with bangs swept far to the side. Tegan had to hide a smirk, her natural cockiness making her want to lay on the flirting. She knew she'd be kicked out faster than she could wink her eye if she tried anything, though.

"If you're already in trouble this early in the game, you better pull yourself together if you want to make it through these next three weeks, Quin," the woman hissed, her mouth just inches away from Tegan's ear.

"Yes, ma'am!" was the only response that seemed fitting to Tegan, so it was the one she went with.

"That's 'Yes, sir,' to you, recruit," she shouted, backing away from Tegan's face. The woman turned to the rest of the recruits, shouting loud enough for them all to hear. "I am Captain Sara Clement, and I am in charging of getting as many of you as possible through the next three weeks. While you are here, you may address me as Captain Clement or Sir, and my word is law." She paused momentarily to let her words sink in.

"Lieutenant Gowans will be your drill supervisor," she went on, motioning to the man who'd been shouting at them a few minutes ago. "You are to treat him the same way you would treat me, with the utmost respect and obedience."

Tegan could barely focus on her words because her eyes were on Sara's eyes. She mentally kicked herself thinking of her as Sara and not Captain, knowing she'd better not make a habit of it. She couldn't think about anything except how beautiful her eyes were.

"Now," Sara shouted. "Lieutenant, run them hard." On those last words, she locked eyes momentarily with Tegan, then turned and marched out.

As Lieutenant Gowans started ordering them into formation, Tegan couldn't help but think that crushing your commanding officer on the first day of boot camp was not the way to start out.


	2. Chapter 2

Captain Sara Clement paced in front of her desk, the door of her office standing slightly ajar. She couldn't believe she was still here, still training recruits like she was some flighty officer that was incapable of anything else. She was an experienced captain, as much field experience as anyone else around here.

The phone on her desk rang, and Sara knew it was the call she'd been waiting for. She picked it up after the second ring.

"Captain Clement," she said, voice tight, trying to hide any emotion she was feeling.

"Clement, this is General Anders."

"Yes, sir. How are you, sir?" she asked, an attempt at politeness.

"I'm gonna cut the pleasantries, Captain. We both know why I'm calling. I got your request, and my answer is the same as last time you asked. You're not ready to go back into the field. It's only been three months."

Sara tried to protest. "But, sir, I'm fine. There's no reason-"

Anders was having none of it. "There's plenty of reason, Clement! You and I both know that you are not emotionally stable enough to go back. Until your superiors there report to me that you're stable, you are not going back into the field. Is that clear, Captain?"

Sara took a deep breath and swallowed her anger. "Yes, sir." Her voice was calm, but underneath she was furious.

"Good. Now, I don't want to hear another word about this. I will let you know when you're ready. Goodbye, Clement." The general hung up, and Sara gentle hung up the phone. She could feel her anger at the general building in her chest. He wasn't even there! How could he know if she was ready or not?

She took another deep breath, closed her eyes, and started counting backwards from thirty, standing completely still and just breathing. By the time she got down to one, she felt better. She knew that she had to keep her emotions under control if she wanted to get out of this damn recruit base. She had to prove to the general that she was ready to go back.

He was right, it had only been three months since the incident. But Sara had been able to shut out almost all feeling about the situation. She ever thought about it, and the nightmares had stopped coming as frequently. She hadn't woken up to her own screams in almost a month. She hadn't seen her soldiers' faces or their dead bodies in her dreams in just as long. She marveled a bit, wondering if that was a good thing or a bad thing. But as she thought about it, images of that night three months ago started to surface, and she felt her pulse start to speed up.

_No,_ she thought to herself. _I have to think about something else. I can't go back to that._

She moved toward her office window. She could see the new recruits in the field outside. Gowans had them doing drills, jumping jacks at the moment. She could just make out his voice even in her office. She smiled to herself just a bit. Ted wasn't an angry or mean person, and it amused Sara to see him being so gruff with the recruits.

She sighed. She was not happy about her current assignment. She really hated having to train new troops. Mostly because at this stage of their training they all thought that joining the Army was just another adventure or a way to get out of their hometown. But it was more than that, and Sara struggled to make them understand that. _Oh well,_ she thought. _They'll figure it out once they get shipped out and have to start eating shitty mess hall food and sleeping in uncomfortable cots and being away from their loved ones for months at a time._ Sara knew that very few of the men and women standing outside would still be in the Army in five years.

Sara's mind drifted to the one recruit, Quin was her name, that had already been doing pushups that morning. Now that one probably wouldn't be around for long. Sara found herself recalling the girl's face. Her twinkling eyes and the smirk that had tugged at the corners of her mouth when Sara had been staring her down. She had really pretty eyes, and it had thrown Sara off for a moment. She had recovered quickly though, trying to be as menacing as possible when she spoke. It surprised Sara when she realized that she liked Quin's spunk. She didn't normal appreciate cockiness in her soldiers. But in Quin, it seemed fitting. And that worried Sara.

Sara shook her head, turning to a mirror hanging on the wall by the door. She straightened her uniform and pulled on her black captain's beret, pushing her bangs back so they were almost hidden. She nodded to herself, satisfied with her appearance.

"Time to go yell at some recruits," she muttered to herself with a sigh and she marched out to the training field. She decided then that she was going to have to permanently wipe that smirk off Quin's face.


	3. Chapter 3

Tegan spent the rest of the day, running, climbing, jumping, and running some more. Gowans ran them hard, just like Captain Clement had told him to do. Muscles were aching that Tegan didn't even know she had before then. She was proud of herself for being the only girl that didn't throw up at some point, though. And with the way training was going, that was quite a feat.

The battalion was back where it had started the morning: in formation outside the barracks. Clement was there, standing quietly as Gowans briefed the recruits on what would be happening the rest of their day. He wasn't shouting anymore, and Tegan was pretty sure it was because he voice was worn out from all the screaming he had done already.

He explained where the recruits would eat dinner, where they would shower, and where they would sleep. Tegan was only half listening because she couldn't tear her eyes or attention from Sara. _No, Captain Clement,_ she reminded herself. It was true what they said: everyone does love a man, or woman, in uniform. Tegan had never seen someone who could be stunningly beautiful and yet fiercely intimidating at the same time. Her high cheekbones and angled jawline were… beyond words. Tegan couldn't keep her eyes off her, and she was thankful that Clement's military composure kept her eyes from wandering.

Unfortunately, Captain Clement was an Army officer for good reason. She could feel someone's gaze boring into her, and with a quick flick of her gaze toward Tegan, she knew the recruit was staring her down.

Without a word, Clement marched to where Tegan stood in the middle of the front row of the formation. She stopped mere inches from Tegan's face. Gowan's stopped talking and stepped back, giving Clement the battalion's full attention to their captain.

Tegan could barely breath. She clenched her hands at her sides to stop them from visibly shaking. The captain had caught her staring. And now she was going to pay hell for it, she knew. Clement didn't move, her eyes darkened with anger as she stared directly into Tegan's eyes. Tegan was sure she could read every thought passing through her mind.

"Is there something you'd like to say to me, recruit?" Clement said, her voice hard.

Tegan gulped visibly. "No ma- sir."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, sir."

"Lieutenant," the captain said without turning. "Send the rest of the recruits to the mess hall." She continued to stare at Tegan, who didn't move and barely breathed. Clement was still only inches from her face and Tegan felt like she might actually be leaning back from her slightly.

"Yes, sir," Gowans said firmly. "Alright, get to the mess hall and get yourself some chow!" he shouted. As the other recruits filed past, Tegan didn't move. Her eyes were still locked with Clement's.

Tegan didn't know what was going to happen, but she was sure that it would be bad. _Damn,_ she dared to think, still worried that the captain might be able to read her mind. _This was not how I planned to start the first day of my military career._


	4. Chapter 4

Sara stood beside an obstacle course, three huge floodlights casting an eerie kind brightness over the course. Her arms were crossed over her chest as she watched Quin climb over the huge rope net at the near end of the course. She'd been trying for almost ten minutes now. Sara wondered if maybe she should let her come down, but decided to make her finish. Quin had run over ten miles, done close to 100 pushups and almost as many sit ups, and she'd been through the hundred yard obstacle course at least ten times, all in the past three hours. The obstacle course was fairly grueling in and of itself, but with all the rest of Quin's punishment piled on top of that, it was excruciating.

Sara was proud of the recruit though. Not once in the hours since Sara had separated her from the rest of the recruits had Quin said a word expect for "yes, sir" when necessary. Sara had pushed her hard, really hard. And even after the full day of training, Quin pushed through it. Sara couldn't help but be thoroughly impressed. Sara never would have been able to do on her first what she had made Quin do.

Sara wasn't even sure why she pushed Quin so hard. She knew the recruit had been staring at her. Blatantly really. Yes, it bothered her that Quin had been caught not paying attention to Gowans again. And it bothered her that the recruit was very obviously checking her out. But what had bothered Sara even more was that she had appreciated it. She liked that the attractive recruit was staring at her.

She couldn't help but admit that Quin was an attractive woman. Her strong jaw, her sparkling eyes, the curls that just barely poked out from under her cap. And that hint of a smirk from the morning had caught Sara's eye. She couldn't help but think that Quin's face was probably even more beautiful when she was really smiling.

_Stop, Clement!_ Sara mentally kicked herself._ You can't be thinking like this! Especially about a recruit that you've barely even met!_ But the thoughts were at the edge of her mind all day long. That's why she even came by to check on the new recruits before they went to the mess hall for dinner. She wanted to see if Quin was behaving herself. Little did she know she would catch Quin staring straight at her the whole time.

Sara focused her eyes on Quin, who was trudging slowly toward her. She had finally made it over the net, and Sara could tell she was absolutely beat. She had lost the spring in her step a long time ago, and she was really looking worn thin now. Sara didn't move or say anything until Quin stopped and stood at attention a few feet in front of her.

"At ease, Quin," she said quietly. Quin relaxed visibly, and Sara could see the muscles in her arms and legs twitching from exhaustion. Sara was quite for a few moments, and Quin didn't meet her eyes. She just stared blankly ahead.

"I'm proud of you, Quin," Sara said. "I honestly did not expect you to last this long."

"Thank you, sir," Quin said.

"Do you know why I made you do all that?" Sara asked. She wanted to know what Quin thought was the reason behind the punishment she'd received.

"No, sir." Sara squinted her eyes at Quin. Either she knew and was refusing to admit to it, or she really didn't know.

"Because you were very obviously not listening to anything that Lieutenant Gowans was saying earlier. And that's the second time today you were ignoring him today. I thought you would have learned your lesson the first time."

"I'm sorry, sir. It won't happen again." From the sound of her voice and the quivering of her body, Sara was sure that it wouldn't.

"You are dismissed, Quin," Sara said, her voice taking on a softer tone. "Go to the mess and get some food. Tell them I sent you and that they're to give you as much as you want to eat. Then get to your bunk. You'll be expected to join the rest of the recruits for drills in the morning."

Quin saluted and walked away. Sara headed back to her own office as well. She knew she should get to bed, but she had to do something first.

Once she was at her desk, Sara dug through the personnel files for the recruits. She pulled out Quin's once she found it.

"Tegan," she muttered to herself, reading Quin's first name. She like the way it sounded on her tongue. Maybe a little too much.


	5. Chapter 5

Tegan dragged herself to her bunk, not-so-silently cursing Captain Clement.

"Fuck," she groaned as she lay down on her back. Her muscles burned like there were flames trapped in her body. Even taking a hot shower hadn't helped much. Her arms lay limp at her sides, and her calf muscles were still trembling slightly. But even though she was exhausted, she couldn't fall asleep. All she could do was lay awake and fume.

She was beyond angry. She was furious at the captain. There was no reason for her to push Tegan so much! She didn't deserve it! It would have been one thing if she had made Tegan run a few miles or go through the obstacle course three or four times. But what Tegan had to endure was ridiculous. She knew if she had really wanted to, she could have collapsed long before she did. But she couldn't bring herself to giving Sara the satisfaction of breaking her.

Tegan didn't even bother to correct herself anymore. Sara had lost some of Tegan's respect, and she refused to continue to call her captain in her head. Sara was a bully in Tegan's eyes. A very beautiful bully, and one that Tegan felt the need to impress. But she was still a bully.

The main thought that kept Tegan's mind racing was why. She couldn't wrap her mind around why Sara thought she needed to try to break Tegan. Because that's how Tegan felt: broken, at least physically. Mentally, Tegan had never been more determined to show Sara up. To show every one of the recruits up. She decided then and there that she was going to be the very best. Not just the best recruit, or the best in the camp. But the very best soldier she could possibly be. She was going to run faster, climb higher, work harder, and learn better than everyone else.

That would show the smug captain. That would show her Tegan was not someone to be messed with. Tegan realized she wanted to hear Sara say those words again. She wanted to hear "I'm proud of you." But next time, she wanted Sara's face to match the words. She wanted to see on Sara's perfectly sculpted face how impressed she was.

As Tegan finally drifted off to sleep around one in the morning, Sara's face was in her mind's eye and she could almost hear her smooth voice. "I'm proud of you."

Tegan's day started at 0430. With barely three hours of sleep, she crawled out of bed when the bugle blew. She rubbed her eyes and dressed quickly. She had about ten minutes to get outside and get in formation with the rest. She quickly changed into her fatigues and set down to lace up her boots. Glancing around, Tegan noticed that there were only about ten girls staying in their barracks room. She hadn't realized before how few women there were in the battalion.

She went to the showers and brushed her teeth at one of the sinks, giving herself a once over in the smudged mirror. Her hair was a mess, but she'd have a hat on so it wouldn't matter. Her eyes had deep dark circles under them though. She had slept restlessly, and she could see it on her face.

"I can do this," she muttered to herself. She knew she had to push on, no matter how tired she was. She remembered her promise to herself from the night before. She was going to be the best. And it was starting today.

She made it outside just in time. With the rest of the recruits, Lieutenant Gowans led them in their morning run, chanting as they ran. After three miles, he sent them to breakfast. Tegan wolfed down as much as she could, still trying to make up for last night's strenuous activity.

Tegan spent the rest of the morning and afternoon in training. And not once did she see Sara, at least not in person. She couldn't stop thinking about her. And she didn't even know why. If she didn't stay focused on what she was doing, her mind drifted. She hated Sara, and yet she felt a need to please her as well. She wanted to be able to not care what Sara thought, but Tegan knew that for the rest of her training, that's all that she would be able to think about. She wanted Sara's approval.

Why, she wasn't sure. What she was sure of was that she wanted to see Sara. She just wanted to see her face again. Tegan felt like she was missing something that she hadn't even known existed until yesterday. She had no relationship with Sara, but she couldn't help but wonder if there was any way to build one.

Much to her disappointment, Tegan got through the entire day without seeing Sara once. Not even after dinner, when Gowans was debriefing them for the day. Tegan was sure Sara would have shown up, just to see how things were going. But she didn't. Tegan trudged back to the barracks to shower and go to bed, passing Sara's office on her way. She glanced at the window, not expecting to see her, but hoping.

To her surprise, Sara was standing looking out the window, arms crossed. Tegan stopped and looked at her. Sara's eyes met her own, and they just stared at each other. Ten seconds passed. Thirty. A full minute passed before Sara turned away and walked out of view. Tegan closed her eyes, committing the memory of Sara's face to memory.

As she showered, she wondered where Sara was and if she was thinking about Tegan. When she fell into bed and closed her eyes, Sara's face filled her mind. She couldn't stop thinking about her eyes. They had been softer when Tegan saw her at the window. She weren't cold like they had been before. They were gentle, almost caring. Tegan tried to understand why Sara looked at her the way she had, but she couldn't decipher it. As Tegan drifted into sleep, dreams of Sara accompanied her.

Sara sat on the edge of her bed, head in her hands. She was scared to sleep. She was scared of what her slumber would bring, what images in would raise.

Last night, Sara had dreamed about Tegan Quin. She had dreamed Tegan was in her bed. It wasn't sexual, but Tegan was holding her as she slept, and Sara had never felt so secure. When she woke in the morning to her alarm, she felt more relaxed and rested than she had felt in god knows how long. She rolled over, expecting to be facing Tegan only to find herself in her bed alone.

That's when the fear set in. The last time she had started to develop feelings for one of her subordinates…. Sara couldn't bring herself to think about how that ended.

And then she had seen Tegan. As she stood by her window, there she was. She had stopped to stare at Sara, and Sara could see exhaustion written all over her. She felt terrible, and she knew her face showed it. She couldn't help it. Her guard dropped for a moment, but then the stare went on too long and she had to break it. She was starting to feel too much. And that scared Sara.

She stood abruptly, shaking her head. She had to get some fresh air. She had stayed in her office all day, scared to check on the recruits because she was afraid to see Tegan. Now that all the recruits were in the barracks though, she decided to go for a run. Maybe that would help her calm down.


	6. Chapter 6

That first week of boot camp was a blur to Tegan after the first two days. She did drills every morning and night, had training in the afternoons. This was the easy week. The week of learning how to stand and march, how to tell someone's rank, how to hold a gun. Everything blended together, but by the time Saturday night rolled around, she felt like she had really started to get the hang of things. She wasn't out of step with the marches anymore. She had memorized the layout of the base, and she recognized most of the officers.

Tegan barely saw Sara the whole week. Sara was only occasionally at the evening debriefings, and she never ran with the recruits in the morning. Tegan was beginning to wonder if Sara's appearance the first two days were out of the norm, and that she wasn't expected to be involved with the recruits.

It wasn't until Sunday morning, during Lieutenant Gowans' explanation of the next week, that Sara finally showed up again. Tegan felt her heart flutter a bit when she saw the captain, but she refused to let her nerves show.

Gowans said that for the next week, the recruits would be doing unarmed combat training, or Ground Combat Training. They would also be working on team building exercises and first aid training. Tegan thought that Sara was merely going to be observing, but she was wrong.

"Now," Gowans shouted. "Captain Clement will explain the event planned for the end of this week." He turned and saluted Sara, then stepped back.

Sara began pacing in front of the recruits. "Alright, recruits," she said. Tegan was surprised by how her voice was quiet, and yet it was captivating enough to keep the recruits' attention. "As Lieutenant Gowans said, you're going to be work on Ground Combat Training. You would do well to pay close attention to everything you learn, because at the end of the week there will be a combat competition."

A murmur ran through the ranks. Tegan smirk silently, sure that she'd be able to beat anyone she had to fight.

"Here's how it will work," Sara continued. "Throughout your training, the officers will be watching you, looking for the best fighters. The top man and the top woman will be chosen at the end of training. On Saturday afternoon, in place of your second training session, the man will be fighting against Lieutenant Gowans. Gowans has been training recruits for years, and he has never yet been beaten." Another murmur rippled through, this time mostly from the guys, each one determined to be the first to beat him.

"The woman who is chosen will be fighting me." Everyone was silent at that. Tegan's jaw almost dropped. Her mind was reeling. She knew she had two choices. She either had to make sure she was bad and wouldn't get chosen, or she'd have to physically fight Sara. Thought of fighting Sara, rolling around and grabbing at her…. It was enough to make Tegan feel a little hot under the collar. It was already hard enough to keep her mind from going places it shouldn't when it came to her superior, but taking Sara on in hand to hand combat…. Tegan had to focus. She knew she had to be her very best and that it would likely end in grappling with Sara. But she didn't have to think about that right now. She knew she would definitely be thinking about it later, though.

Sara watched Tegan out of the corner of her eye. She had seen her face drop when Sara said she would be fighting one of the women. She saw the way her eyes widened and her face turned a bit red.

Sara didn't want to have to fight Tegan, but she couldn't break the tradition just because she was attracted to one of the recruits. Sara wasn't even sure Tegan would be chosen, but she knew it was likely. She also knew there was no way she could avoid it.


	7. Chapter 7

Tegan wrapped her legs around Sara's and grabbed at the arm around her throat. She could barely breath, and she knew she had to get out of Sara's grasp or she would lose the fight. As she tugged on Sara's arm, she used her legs to press Sara's knee backward. Sara hissed through her teeth, and her grip on Tegan's throat loosened. Tegan slipped out of her grip, and grabbed her wrist, trying to pull it behind Sara's back.

But Sara rolled with Tegan, wrapping her legs around Tegan's. They were facing each other with Sara on her back, but Sara was still in control. She slipped her leg between Tegan's, trying to roll her over. Tegan froze, Sara's thigh pressed firmly to her core. Either Sara didn't realize where her thigh was or she didn't care, because as she tried to roll Tegan onto her back she kept pressing her thigh against Tegan.

Tegan closed her eyes, trying not to focus on the heat forming between her thighs. She was supposed to be fighting, and Sara was making it difficult for her to focus. She grabbed at Sara's arms, but Sara was too quick. Before Tegan realized what was happening, Sara had Tegan's head caught between her arm and shoulder. Tegan tried to squirm free, but she couldn't. She turned her head, trying to slip away from Sara. But as soon as Tegan turned her face toward Sara's neck, she was caught up in the smell of Sara. It took every ounce of self-control Tegan possessed not to press her lips to Sara's neck and taste her skin.

Sara's leg was still pressed between Tegan's. Without warning, Sara rolled and Tegan was on her back. Sara's full weight was on Tegan, and Tegan couldn't stop herself from rolling her hips against Sara's leg. Tegan closed her eyes and bit her lip to hold back a moan. Her head still trapped against Sara's neck, and without thinking she bit her neck to keep herself quiet.

When Tegan bit her neck, Sara gasped in shock. She held onto Tegan tighter, trying to make her give up. Instead, she just put more pressure on the steadily growing heat between Tegan's legs. Tegan was losing control of herself. She pressed her hips harder against Sara's leg. The white undershirt that Sara had been wearing had come untucked, and Tegan's hands found the soft skin of her sides. She kissed Sara's neck, flicking her tongue against her sweaty skin. Sara moaned this time, and Tegan dragged her nails down her sides. The headlock Sara had put Tegan in had turned into Sara clutching Tegan to her.

Sara moved her leg against Tegan's core, and Tegan shuddered. She was closer to the edge then she liked to admit. But with Sara's body pressed against her and her skin under Tegan's hands and mouth, she couldn't help it. Tegan started to ride Sara's leg, her body begging for release.

Suddenly, Sara's grabbed Tegan by the back of her head, running her fingers through her hair pulling Tegan's mouth away from her neck. Then Sara's mouth was on Tegan's neck, nipping at her ear, running her tongue along Tegan's chiseled jaw, and kissing the sensitive skin at the side of her neck. Tegan groaned loudly, riding against Sara's leg.

Tegan closed her eyes for a moment, and when she opened them, everything was dark. She froze, and looked around her. Sara was gone. Tegan sat up and looked around. She was in the barracks in her bunk. The sheets were thrown to the floor, and Tegan was covered in sweat.

Realization hit her. She had been dreaming. Sara had never touched her. She had never touched Sara. She guess that she must have moaned in her sleep loud enough to wake herself up. She had never had such a vivid dream, and she hoped that none of the other women she shared the room with had heard her.

Tegan knew why she had had the dream. She found out that evening that she had been chosen to fight Sara tomorrow. She would have to do it. She had done excellently in the ground fighting exercises all week, and she had been chosen.

As she lay in bed, she willed the heat between her legs to dissipate. She know she couldn't possibly get herself off with other people around. She was not quiet, and she knew it. She would just have to hope she would be able to sleep it off.

Her last thought before she final drifted back to sleep almost an hour later was that she hoped the real fight wouldn't turn out like the one she had dreamed.


	8. Chapter 8

Sara was having a terrible day. Not because things were going wrong. Not because she had received bad news. Not because she was in trouble. Sara was having a terrible day because it was Saturday. It was Saturday, and at 1730 she had to fight Tegan Quin. She had to get down on the mats in the gym and wrestle the woman she hadn't been able to get off her mind all week.

She was dreading it. She had to drown herself in paperwork and phone calls to keep herself from thinking about it. The thought made her physically sick. Not because she didn't want to do it, but because of how desperately she did want it. She wanted to know what Tegan's hands felt like on her body. She wanted to feel the warmth of Tegan's breath on her skin. She wanted touch Tegan, and not just with her hands.

Sara was scared, because she didn't know if she would be able to control herself. She could barely keep herself from staring at the beautiful woman. Tegan's eyes were always warm and sparkling with a joy Sara had forgotten long ago. Her creamy skin looked so soft and inviting that Sara struggled to resist the urge to touch Tegan whenever she was near her.

At night, when Sara would lay awake with only the sound of her own breathing to keep her company, she would imagine that Tegan was next to her. She wished for the warmth of another body to chase away the loneliness that would so often leave her sleepless. She imagined being able to curl up with Tegan, resting her head on Tegan's chest and letting her wrap her arms around her. She wondered what Tegan's lips felt like, how soft they were, what her kiss would taste like.

At the beginning of the week, Sara would have guessed that maybe Tegan felt something similar to the desire she felt. But over the past few days, Tegan had stopped looking at her. It was almost like she had stopped caring. If she had to speak to Sara, every answer was a short "yes, sir," or "no, sir." The smirk she used to wear when Sara was near had disappeared, and Sara guessed that any attraction there had been between them was gone, too.

At 1720, Sara started walking on shaky legs toward the gym across camp. Her hands were already sweaty, and she had no idea how she was going to be able to make it through the fight. She felt weak at the thought of trying to restrain herself. Well, that and the possibility of having Tegan on top of her.

When she reach the gym, all the recruits were already there. Sara spotted Tegan immediately. She was wearing just a white t-shirt tucked into her camo pants and her boots. She wasn't wearing her cap, and her curly hair was sticking out at odd angles, but it was adorable. Sara let out a breath she didn't realize she had been holding. She took a few deep breaths, and then Lieutenant Gowans noticed her.

"Attention, recruits!" He shouted, snapping to attention himself. All the recruits turned to face Sara and raised their arms in salute. Sara glanced at Tegan, but her face was blank. Sara couldn't tell if she was as nervous as she was. She gave a sloppy salute that the recruits quickly returned.

Gowans explained the rules of the fight to everyone, but Sara just stood by him and stared blankly ahead. _I have to stay under control,_ she thought as Gowans shouted. _I can do this. It's just a fight. I've done this before. I can handle it. Just make it quick, Clement. Quick and easy._

"Quin!" Gowans shouted. "You're up first." He turned and nodded at Sara. She shot him a quick smile and started to unbutton her jacket as Tegan walked to the middle of the mats in the middle of the gym. The rest of the recruits circled around them. Sara caught Tegan's eye as she slipped the jacket off her shoulders, leaving her in just a black t-shirt. Tegan gulped, but other than that she showed no reaction.

Gowans walked to the middle of the mat. "Alright. Quin, Captain. Let's keep it clean." Sara reached her hand out to shake Tegan's. "The fight will start on my mark." Gowans moved to the edge of the mat. "3, 2, 1, fight!"

Sara didn't move, but Tegan crouched and started to circle her. They were supposed to be grappling, not having an actual fist fight. Which made Sara very happy, because she knew she couldn't hit Tegan.

Without warning, Tegan lunged for Sara. She was expecting it though, and easily jumped out of the way. She gave Tegan a shove as she flew by, sending her sprawling on the mat. Tegan was back on her feet before Sara could make a move. But now she was mad. Sara had successfully made her look like a fool in less than a minute. Her eyes were alight with Sara could only guess was anger.

Sara knew she had to move in and end the fight before Tegan had time to recover too much. She crouched like Tegan, arms up and ready in front of her. Tegan moved again, reaching out to try to grab Sara's arm. But Sara twisted her hand away and grabbed Tegan's forearm at the same time as she swept her legs out from under her. In an instant, she was straddling Tegan, one knee in Tegan's back and Tegan's arm twisted behind her.

Sara was shocked. She didn't think Tegan would be that easy to beat. Without warning, Tegan tensed and rolled into the leg Sara had on the ground, knocking her over and forcing her let go of Tegan's arm. Sara was under Tegan, and she was starting to panic. She couldn't let this happen. She knew she had to be in control of Tegan or she might lose control of herself.

But Tegan was quick. As Sara tried to roll out from under her, Tegan dropped, putting her full weight on Sara's back. She tried to get her arm around Sara's neck, but Sara grabbed her arm. They struggled for a few moments, rolling, grabbing, and kicking at each other. Sara was losing it. She felt Tegan's labored breath on her neck, her hands on Sara's arms, and her legs trying to wrap themselves with Sara's.

After what felt like an eternity, Tegan caught her right arm and pulled in behind her back. Tegan rolled onto her back, holding Sara down with her legs. She had one leg wrapped up with both of Sara's, and the other around Sara's waist. Sara tried to move her head, but before she could try to squirm free, Tegan's arm was around her throat.

They both stopped moving. Tegan wasn't choking Sara hard enough to hurt her, just enough to keep her from moving. Tegan was breathing on her ear, and Sara couldn't control the shiver than ran down her spine. Involuntarily, and image jumped into her mind. For a split second she imagined Tegan naked under her, bare skin pressed against her own skin. She could almost feel Tegan's lips on her neck, and her breast pressed into Sara's back.

An low groan escaped her lips, and she heard Tegan suck in a breath. Without thinking, Sara tried to pull away from Tegan, but only managed to roll them over. That only made things worse, because Tegan's full weight was on her then. Tegan's leg had moved, and it was now between Sara's own legs. Sara felt something growing in her center that she hadn't felt in a long time.

She closed her eyes hard. She knew Tegan would never give up. And she knew that if she kept going things would end badly. And by badly, she meant they would end with her probably touching Tegan in ways that would be completely and totally inappropriate for an officer to touch any of her subordinates.

Sara pulled her arm out from under herself and smacked the mat. She heard Gowans telling Tegan to get off her, and she did. Sara stood up quickly, refusing to meet Tegan's eyes. All the recruits were cheering. Tegan was the first recruit who had ever beaten Captain Clement. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Tegan's proud smile and her heart melted. She had to get out of there. She needed a cold shower, and she needed it fast.

She saluted Lieutenant Gowans and promptly strode out of the gym, leaving him to finish the his fight and send the recruits off. She couldn't handle being in the same room with Tegan anymore. She needed to think, to figure out how the fuck she was going to deal with what she was feeling.


	9. Chapter 9

Tegan tiptoed to the door of the barracks. It was past lights out, almost 2200. She was meeting some of the other recruits to go out to a bar just outside the base. They had invited her as a sort of celebration for her beating Sara earlier. Tegan was more than happy to get some alcohol into her system. She needed something to help soften the stinging pain in her heart.

Ever since the fight, she hadn't been able to shake the feeling of Sara's body against her. She knew she had to get Sara out of her mind or she would never be able to focus enough to get through basic training. And a little booze might be just what she needed to forget.

She met the guys outside their barracks. There were only five of them. Any more and they would have run the risk of attracting too much attention. They were in street clothes, so hopefully nobody would notice them at the bar. They weren't technically allowed to leave the base, but everyone knew that as long as they didn't get caught or cause trouble they would get away with it.

It didn't take Tegan long to realize that drinking was only going to make things worse. After her second beer, she couldn't stop her mind from wandering to Sara. To how it had felt to have her body underneath her. How it felt to have Sara's hands on her, and how hard it had been not to press her lips to Sara's neck.

She wondered what Sara's skin tasted like. She tried to imagine what Sara's body felt like against her own once she'd been freed from her cumbersome clothes. She imagined running her hands up her sides, caressing her cheek, kissing her soft lips.

"Hey, Quin!" Tegan jumped when she heard one of the guys say her name.

"Huh?" she mumbled.

"Where's your head? You've been out of it for the past ten minutes."

"Sorry," she said, standing. "I'm not feeling to great. I think I'm gonna head back." Without waiting for a reply, she put a ten on the bar to cover her tab and a tip, and she walked out. It was a ten minute walk back to base, and in the chilly night wind she pulled her leather jacket closer around her.

The whole walk back, she had to continually remind herself that Sara was her superior. She shouldn't be thinking about her the way she was.

"Fuck, Quin," she muttered to herself. "You've gotta get yourself under control. She's an officer! And you've barely made it through two weeks of basic. She has no feelings for you, and you've gotta move on. She's out of your reach." She kept telling herself over and over that there was no way anything could ever happen between her and the captain.

But once Tegan was back on the base and walking back to the barracks, she saw a light on in Sara's office. A shadow passed across the wall and she knew it must be Sara's. Without thinking, she changed directions and walked towards her office. She tiptoed up the steps, and stood before the door. Her heart was pounding in her chest, and her hands were shaking. She didn't know what she wanted to accomplish, or even what she would say if she knocked. She just wanted to see Sara's face. She knew she had to come up with a plausible reason as to why she would be at the captain's door in the middle of the night.

She was about to turn away, unable to force herself to knock, when the door opened. Light poured out over Tegan. Sara was standing in the doorway, arms crossed over her chest. For a long moment, neither of them moved or said anything. Finally Sara spoke.

"Is there something I can help you with, Quin?"

Sara stood face to face with the very woman she had spent the last few hours trying not to think about. She couldn't believe it. What terrible twist of fate had decided to test her tonight? This was not a night that she thought she could be strong on. She might have had a couple drinks when she got back from the fight. And maybe a couple more after she had taken a long, cold shower. And maybe she was in the middle of pouring another one when she had seen Tegan walking up the road by her office, just before she had jumped out of the window in hopes that Tegan wouldn't see her.

The point being, she was a little tipsy. And from the looks of things, Tegan had been out drinking, too. For one, Sara thought she could smell alcohol on her. Or maybe that was just herself she was smelling. But she was also out of uniform, wearing a pair of dark jeans and a fitted leather jacket of a plain white V-neck.

Sara gulped visibly. Tegan was even more stunning in street clothes than she was in uniform. The V-neck was tight, tight enough to accentuate her breasts just enough to catch Sara's attention. _Wow, _she thought. _I wonder…_ Tegan cleared her throat and Sara jerked her eyes up to her face. She had been staring, and Tegan had caught her. _Fuck. The alcohol is helping at all right now. _Tegan just stared at her.

"I said, is there something I can help you with, Quin?" Tegan didn't reply, but she took a step closer to Sara. Sara's breath caught in her throat. Tegan was only a few inches away from. A sudden urge to reach out and put her hand on Tegan's waist made Sara take a few steps back in order to resist it.

Tegan followed Sara, closing the gap between them. They were inside the doorway now, and Tegan reached behind her and shut the door.

"I, uh- I don't think you should be in here, Quin," Sara stuttered. She had to get Tegan out before she did something she would regret in the morning. The look in Tegan's eyes made Sara freeze, though. Her eyes had darkened and filled with some emotion Sara couldn't identify.

_If I had to guess, I would think that maybe she wants me just as bad as I want her,_ Sara thought, unable to tear her eyes away from Tegan's. Her breathing was erratic and her palms were sweaty.

"Tegan, you need to leave." She covered her mouth. She hadn't to call Tegan by her first name. She knew that by letting Tegan's name slip from her lips, she had started something that she wasn't she would be able to stop.

Tegan didn't move, and Sara started to get desperate. "Listen, I don't know why you came here," she said. Her voice was shaking and she was talking fast. "You need to go now, though. You can't be here this late at night. It's against all protocol and-"

Suddenly, Tegan's hands were on her face and she had closed the small gap between them. Before she could stop it, Sara felt soft lips press against hers. She couldn't hold back the weak moan that escaped her throat. She tried to force herself to pull away from the lips caressing her own, but she couldn't. Her body wouldn't let her. This touch, this simple kiss, was everything her body had been begging for for almost two weeks. And now that she had it, she could not give it up.

Sara put one had on Tegan's face, running her thumb gently over her cheek. She moved her lips against Tegan's, and she felt Tegan's had drop from her face to run fingers through her hair. Sara managed to swallow another moan, surprised at how much she really wanted this.

Tegan brushed Sara's bottom lip with her tongue, and Sara tilted her head and let Tegan slip her tongue in her mouth. A wave of heat coursed through Sara's veins, straight to her core. She wrapped her arm around Tegan's waist, pulling her closer. Tegan's tongue was so slick and hot in her mouth, and Sara brushed her own against it gently. She leaned into Tegan's kiss, deepening it as much as she dared.

Sara's mind was completely blank. All she could register was the feeling of Tegan's tongue against her own and her soft curves pressed to Sara's body. Sara ran her hand through Tegan's hair, finally touching curls she had admired from a distance. Their tongues danced together, and Tegan's hips pressed against Sara's. Sara stumbled backwards, thrown off balance. Tegan caught her, though, not breaking the kiss. Tegan kept walking, leading Sara backward until she felt the back of her thighs bump her desk.

Without warning, Tegan lifted Sara up and sat her on the edge of the desk. Tegan pulled away from their kiss, only to attach her lips to Sara's neck. She kissed along her jaw, catching her ear between her teeth. Sara's mouth fell open in a silent moan. Tegan's breath on here ear drove her wild. She pulled Tegan as close as she could get her, throwing her legs around Tegan's waist.

One thought jumped into her mind. Stop. She knew this was going too far. But the alcohol in her system combined with the growing need at her core kept her from stopping. Tegan breathed heavily in Sara's ear, and Sara shuddered.

"Sara," Tegan whispered. Hearing her name coming from Tegan's mouth sent a pulse of desire through Sara. She pressed her hips hard against Tegan's and pulled Tegan's mouth back to hers. She needed to taste her again. She forced her tongue into Tegan's mouth, taking control. She kissed Tegan like she had never kiss anyone before, pouring every ounce of desire and fear into that moment. She heard a groan from Tegan, and she felt herself getting wetter.

She had to have her. She had to have Tegan right then and there. She didn't care if she was Tegan's captain, she wanted Tegan's hands on her skin. She wanted Tegan inside of her.

Tegan must have been able to sense her growing need, because she pulled Sara's shirt up just enough to slip her hands underneath. Sara shuddered at Tegan's touch. Fingernails dug into Sara's sides, and Sara pressed her hips into Tegan, trying to gain some friction on her aching core.

The phone rang suddenly, making Tegan and Sara jump apart.

"Fuck," Tegan said. Sara jumped down from the desk, hurriedly tucking her shirt in while the phone rang for a second time. She took a deep breath, trying to clear her head. She put one hand on the receiver, letting it ring again before answering promptly.

"Captain Clement," she said. Her voice was once again clear and commanding, not betraying what she had been doing only moments before. It was General Anders. He had called to make sure that Sara was aware that another group of recruits would be arriving in the morning and that they were to be put under the command of another captain on the base. She told him she was aware, and ended the call quickly.

But when she turned around to face Tegan, she was gone. Without thinking, Sara sank down to the floor, rested her forehead on her knees, and wept.


	10. Chapter 10

AN: Thank you guys so much for your support! I know this is a short chapter, but it's something. Enjoy! -LB

It had been eight weeks since the night Tegan beat Sara. Since the night Tegan kissed Sara. Since the night she ran away from Sara. Both of them had cried themselves to sleep. Neither of them had spoken to each other again outside of what was absolutely necessary. And neither of them were the same.

Every night, Sara struggled to fall asleep because she knew she would dream about Tegan and wake up in the morning without her. She could barely handle it. She had to dump all her liquor because she had started to drink heavily. For the first week after, she was falling into deep depression.

But she had decided that she had to do what was best for her. She had to pull herself up by her bootstraps, move on, and dedicate herself into getting out of that base. And finally, two months after General Anders told her she wasn't ready to leave recruit training, she got another call from him. It was on a Friday afternoon and Sara had been buried in paperwork when her phone rang.

"When can you be ready to ship out?" he asked.

"Tomorrow morning," she answered, trying not to sound too eager.

"Good. A major will be there to pick you up in the morning. You sure you can wrap everything up by then?"

Sara nodded vigorously. "Yes, sir. I'm sure." She was ecstatic. She was getting back in the field. She was going to be commanding troops again. She couldn't wait. But even though she was excited, she also felt a twinge of sadness. She would be leaving Tegan. And while that was definitely good for her mental health and keeping herself out of trouble, she felt like she was going to be leaving someone she had grown to care about.

In the past few weeks, she had seen Tegan grow a lot as a soldier. She was at the top of her class in every single aspect of her training, even compared to the men. She had worked her ass off, and it was paying off. Once Tegan finished Phase III of her basic training in a few more weeks, she would move on to any Advanced Individual Training school that she wanted too. Sara was more than pleased with Tegan's progress. She was impressed. She didn't think that Tegan had it in her.

Sara decided that before she left, she was going to write a letter of recommendation for Tegan, which would basically get her any job she wanted once she finished training. Sara wanted Tegan to be able to do the very best she could, and she was willing to help however she could.

That evening, when the recruits were all gathered together after dinner, Sara went out to tell them that she would be leaving. She introduced them to the captain that would be taking her place, and she gave them a last salute.

As she was getting ready to leave, Sara allowed herself to catch Tegan's eye for the first time since they had kissed. She was shocked to see a tear rolling down Tegan's cheek, and her stomach dropped.

Tegan was crying for her. She didn't want her to leave, even though Tegan knew that there could be nothing between them if she did stay. She was going to miss seeing Sara's face and knowing that she was nearby. But most of all she was scared that something terrible might happen to her while she was in the field. Tegan knew that she most likely would never even hear about it if something did happen. And that thought, the thought that Sara could die and she might never know, scared her to death.

After she was in her bunk for the night, Tegan decided she had to see Sara one last time. She had to say goodbye.


	11. Chapter 11

While Sara was packing the last of her personal possessions into her standard issue duffel bag, she heard a gentle knock at the door. She smiled to herself before going to open it, guessing that it must be Gowans coming to say goodbye. Sara and Ted had become good friends over the months they'd been training recruits together. He knocked again a little harder and Sara, shouted, "I'm coming, Ted," as she walked to the door.

But when she opened the door it wasn't Ted who was standing outside. The smile that had been playing at the corner of her mouth faded instantly when she met Tegan's hazel eyes looking back at her. Her breath caught in her lungs, and pulse sped up. This is exactly what she wanted to avoid. She didn't want to have to deal with all the emotion that clouded her mind whenever she thought about this woman.

Tegan spoke before Sara could. "Please, Captain. May I come in?" Her voice was soft submissive. Sara could tell that if she told her no, Tegan would leave. But instead of asking her to leave, Sara opened the door wider and nodded. Tegan stepped inside moved out of the way of the door that Sara shut behind her.

Tegan was the picture of humble and passive. She didn't meet Sara's eyes, she barely looked up from her feet. She looked very small to Sara, which was something she never would have said about Tegan before. Tegan didn't say anything for a long time, but Sara could tell she was trying to. So she waited, wondering what Tegan wanted to say that had her acting so out of character.

Tegan took a deep breath. She had come all this way. She was standing in Sara's quarters, something she had wished for many times of the past weeks. But now that she was there, she couldn't speak. She knew she had to say it. She had to tell Sara what had been going through her mind for the past eight weeks. She took a deep breath and lift her head to meet Sara's steady gaze.

"Captain," she mumbled hesitantly. " I, uh… I had to come tell you something. Now that you're leaving, I know I may never see you again, so I had to tell you how I feel." Tegan's chest tightened and she felt tears stinging at the corners of her eyes. She cursed silently to herself. _Damn it, Quin. You can't break down now. Later, but not now. You have to hold it together. Just for five minutes._

"Captain, I'm sorry to say this… But I think I've fallen for you." Tegan took a shuddering breath, letting that sink in for a moment. She was so embarrassed and ashamed that she couldn't even look up at Sara.

"I didn't mean to. I promise. But it just happened. This whole time, since that first day when you pushed me so hard for staring at you… ever since then I've committed myself to being the very best. And this is the first I've been able to admit it to myself. But I've been doing it for you. This person standing here, is because of you.

"So, I want to thank you, Captain. Thank you for pushing me. And I want you to know I'm going to miss you. I'm going to miss your eyes and your smile and your voice. I'm going to miss the way you push me to be better, even if it's just by your presence." Tegan felt a tear running down her cheek. But she refused to acknowledge it.

"And I want to apologize for what happened last time I was here. I was wrong, and I never should have pushed you. I shouldn't have kissed you, and I needed to tell you before you left that I'm sorry." She finally looked up at Sara. To her surprise, Sara was crying. She was just standing there with her arms at her sides silently sobbing.

Tegan didn't know what to do. She was shocked. What had she said? Before she could try to guess, Sara took two steps toward her and put her hand on Tegan's shoulder. She brushed away the tear on Tegan's cheek gently. Then she leaned in and pressed her lips against Tegan's gently.

Tegan shuddered, and now she couldn't keep the tears from coming. Sara broke the kiss and wrapped her arms around Tegan, pulling her into a tight hug. They both cried, holding each other tightly. They cried for what could never be between them. Tegan cried for Sara leaving. Sara cried for leaving Tegan. And they both cried for the broken hearts that would be left to mend themselves alone in the others absence.


	12. Chapter 12

AN: I know this is short, but this chapter has some important stuff in it! Thanks for reading, guys! I love you all!

Also, I would like to dedicate this chapter to tumblr user ican-whoawhoawhoawhoawhoa. She partially inspired this chapter. -LB

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Sara saw it all in slow motion. The hummer driving up to the outpost. The miles and miles of desert. The sudden explosion that rocked the camp. She saw herself running, tripping. Ripping open the door of the half-destroyed hummer. Pulling one body out of the wreckage. Leaning over her, crying, begging her to hold on. She saw herself being pulled away, from the body. Another explosion as the vehicle's engine combusted.

She saw the funeral. All the officers and soldiers in their dress uniforms as shots were fired over the casket. She saw herself, stoic as ever, refusing to shed a tear. Then crying herself to sleep that night, and six nights after it.

An alarm clock rang, waking Sara out of her nightmare. She was drenched in sweat, her hands were shaking, and her pulse was racing. She threw her blanket off, and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She put her head in her hands and a tear slide down her cheek.

It had been over seven years since she'd dreamed about that day. About Emy. She had been doing so well. And now…. Now that she was going back to where it had happened, it was all coming back.

Emy had been a staff sergeant, stationed under Sara's command. It had been Sara's first commission as a captain, leading the outpost in the middle of the desert in Afghanistan. Emy had been her right hand man, or woman as it were.

And somewhere along the way, Sara had fallen in love with Emy. Emy had taken care of her. It had been hard for Sara to adjust to being fully in command. She got stressed a lot. And Emy was always there for her. Their friendship quickly turned into a relationship, one they couldn't talk about with anyone. So Emy's death had hit Sara harder than many thought was normal.

What was supposed to be a simple supply run, had turned into a tragic accident when Emy's hummer ran over a stray landmine on its return. Emy died of internal bleeding within five minutes. Sara had been sent home for the funeral. When she got back to the states, though, she had an emotional breakdown. Her commanding officers forced her to go to therapy. And even after she seemed to be doing better, they made her stay in the States and train recruits.

But that was seven years ago. And as Sara sat on the edge of her bed, she thought about how far she'd come. She was a Lieutenant Colonel now. She had seen hundreds of recruits graduate their training and become good soldiers. And she was back in the field. She would be going back to Afghanistan to take over from a retiring General in just a few hours. She was excited.

Well, that was before she had woken to a dream of her former lover. She tried not to worry too much as she showered, packed her bags, and headed to the Army base she would be flying out of. She hoped that the dream wasn't a warning about going back.


	13. Chapter 13

AN: Thank you all for being so patient with me! If you guys want, feel free to share this link on tumblr, since some of you may have noticed I'm on a tumblr hiatus. Thanks again, and enjoy! -LB

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Staff Sergeant Tegan Quin sat up abruptly in her bunk. She wasn't sure what had woken her up, so she sat very still and listened. After a moment, she heard it. A helicopter in the distance. It was barely a hum, but it was there, breaking the normal silence of the desert night. It would have worried Tegan if she hadn't been expecting a chopper bringing their new commanding officer.

Since their General had left to retire two weeks ago, Tegan and the encampment in the Afghan desert had been awaiting a new officer. But things had gotten complicated, and the officer change had been delayed. No one planned on leaving Tegan in charge of an entire platoon on her own, but they hadn't been able to avoid it. And if Tegan was honest with herself, it had taken a toll on her.

She was used to leading a smaller unit on her own, but there had never been a need for her to command a whole platoon. And after two weeks of it, she was tired. She hadn't really realized how much work an officer had to do. And now that a new leader was coming in, she was happy to turn over the reins.

Tegan swung her legs off the side of her bunk in the commanding officer's tent. She'd taken up residence there while she was in command. She had slept in half of her uniform because she knew the new officer would be coming in the middle of the night. She checked her watch, seeing that it was just after 0200. She slipped on her combat boots, grabbed her camo jacket, and pulled it on. She buttoned it quickly, searching around for her cap. Of course she would lose it again. She checked under the bed, and there it was.

By the time she had her uniform on right, she could tell the chopper was almost at the landing pad. She threw open the tent flap and practically ran to the landing pad so she would be there when the officer came to camp. As the person in charge, she needed to debrief the officer immediately and turn over command. She made it just in time to be at the edge of the landing pad when the chopper landed.

Out climbed the officer, holding on their cap as they made their way out of the wind from the violent chopper blades. Tegan stood in salute, waiting for the officer. But her arm faltered and nearly dropped to her side when she saw who the new commanding officer was.

Lieutenant Colonel Sara Clement stopped in front of Tegan, her face expressionless expect for the extreme shock registered in her eyes. They hadn't seen each other in almost seven years, but Sara looked exactly the same as she had the day Tegan met her. Her hazel eyes, her beautiful cheekbones, her creamy skin. She was still beautiful. And Tegan couldn't believe that she was actually there in front of her. She had assumed that she would probably never see Sara again. She wasn't sure if she was ecstatic or mortified that Sara was their new officer.

Tegan snapped back when Sara threw her arm up in salute, returning it immediately. Neither of them said anything for a few moments. Tegan was glad no one else had come down to the landing pad with her. The only people up were the sentries, and they weren't paying attention to either of them.

Sara was the first to speak, clearing her throat first. "I didn't expect to meet you here, Sergeant."

"I wasn't expecting to see you either, Colonel." Tegan was surprised she had managed to speak at all. Her mouth was as dry as the sand they stood on, and butterflies rippled through her gut. She didn't know how she'd get through her time serving under Sara's command.

For months after Sara had left the training camp, Tegan would lie awake in bed because she knew if she slept she would dream of Sara's lips against hers, the smoothness of her skin, the taste of her tongue. Even after she was able to sleep through the night without waking up to dreams of Sara, she still thought about her every day. Wondered what could have been possible if the situation was different. Wished that she had met Sara outside of the military.

Even all these years later, she still wondered, dreamed even, about the possibilities. She had allowed herself that liberty because she never expected to see Sara again. But now that Sara was back in her life, she wondered if she should have controlled her imagination a little more.

As Tegan led Colonel Clement around the camp and explained all the routines and events that were a part of the soldiers' lives there, she dug her nails into palm, trying to stop the totally inappropriate images of Sara that flooded into her mind. She had to stay at Sara's side or in front of her to keep herself from staring at her ass. She had to avoid looking her directly in the eyes to stop from glancing at Sara's lips and licking her own.

When Tegan finally led Sara to the commanding officer's tent and cleared her own possessions out so Sara could move in, she knew that she would have to keep a very tight rein on her thoughts if she was going to be able to control her actions.


	14. Chapter 14

AN: Sorry this is kinda short, guys. I know where I want the story to go next, but I'm having a hard tie getting there. Enjoy this, tho! -LB

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As soon as the tent flap closed behind now-Staff Sergeant Quin, Sara collapsed on her new bunk. She couldn't help but think about how Tegan's body had been in the same place hers was laying now. She rolled onto her stomach and took a deep breath. She could smell Tegan on the pillow she had left there. A shiver ran down her spine as she remembered the last time she had smelled Tegan. Holding her and crying into her neck. Breathing in the musky scent of her hot skin between sobs.

She had fixed this. She had let Tegan go. She had moved on. Or so she thought. Now… now that she had seen Tegan again all her former strength had melted. As soon as she had been the clear brown eyes waiting for her at the edge of the chopper pad, the seams that she had used to stitch her broken heart up with began to loosen.

Sara rolled over and sat up. She had to break the spell Tegan had put her under. She started to unpack the few things she had brought with her. She put her uniforms in the chest at the end of the bunk. She really didn't have many personal effects to put in the tent, so she decided to go through the papers sitting on the folding desk opposite the door flap. She tried to loose herself in busywork, but her mind was preoccupied with Tegan.

She wasn't surprised to find that Tegan was the staff sergeant that had been left in charge of camp. Sara had always known that Tegan would do excellently in the Army. She wasn't surprised that it only took her seven years to get to where she was now. She liked to think that maybe the way she had pushed Tegan the first day of boot camp had been the jumpstart of Tegan's military career.

She liked to think that maybe Tegan had been as surprised, and silently elated, to see her as she was to see Tegan. She wondered if Tegan had cried herself to sleep thinking of her. Had she been heartbroken too? Or had she moved on without much thought of Sara?

There was only one thought running through Sara's mind as she slipped off her uniform to get a few hours' sleep before that camp woke: _How the hell am I going to get through this?_

The week that followed was the most awkward of both Tegan and Sara's lives. Tegan had to spend most of her time with Sara to show her the ropes of running camp. Every unit did things a little bit differently, and Sara didn't want to come in a throw everything they had been doing to the wind and do her own thing. So Tegan had to help her.

And that wasn't easy for either of them. There were a couple late nights of going through stacks of papers, anything from supply orders to commands from other generals. There were days of Tegan lead drills and inspections so Sara could watch how they did it.

But by the end of the week, Sara had gotten the hang of things. Unfortunately, she didn't want to have to leave Sara's side. She knew it was inevitable, that she'd be back in the ranks soon. But she didn't want it to happen. And frankly, neither did Sara.

That Friday night, exactly a week since Sara had joined the camp, Sara called Tegan to her tent.

Tegan stopped just inside the door and saluted. Sara return the salute, and Tegan dropped her arm and stood at attention.

"At ease, Sergeant," Sara said softly. Her slight lisp had started up again, and Tegan had learned that it was a sign of her nervousness. Tegan relaxed and let out a breath. She tried to hide her the slight tremor in her hands by clasping them behind her back. She hadn't talked to Sara as anything less than a superior since she'd arrived, and never about anything except the business of the camp.

"I have an offer for you, Quin," Sara said, catching Tegan's attention again.

"Sir?" Tegan was surprised, and admittedly hopeful. What could Sara possibly want from her?

"I'd like you to serve as my right-hand officer." She paused and turned to face Tegan. "I need someone to help me run the camp, and you already have experience. I've already cleared it with the powers that be. They think you would be perfect for the job."

Tegan let out a breath. She couldn't hold in the smirk that played at the corners of her mouth. She was ecstatic. Sara wanted her to work directly with her. Every day. Tegan couldn't help but hope it was because Sara yearned for her company the same way Tegan hated being away from her.

"Yes, sir. I'd love to, sir," she said. She tried not to sound too happy, but from Sara's smile she was sure Sara could tell.

"Good. You'll start in the morning. Report her to my tent first thing in the morning." Sara saluted, signaling Tegan's dismissal. Tegan returned the salute and turned on her heel, heading back to her own bunk. She couldn't keep the broad grin from her face any longer. She had to forced herself not to jump for joy at the thought of being able to spend every day with Sara.


	15. Chapter 15

AN: Sorry it took me so long to update! I've been so busy with work I haven't had time. But I'm pretty sure this is the longest chapter yet, so it should be worth it. I feel pretty shitty about this chapter though. I feel like it was emotionless, but that might just be cause I'm writing while tired or it might actually be bad. Whatever! I hope you guys enjoy it. -LB

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The next days and weeks flew by for Tegan faster than any of the others she'd spent in the Army. She was around Sara all the time. They worked together every day, they ate together, the ran together early in the mornings. Tegan was Sara's second-in-command.

And Tegan was eating it up. Over the past few days, Sara had started to loosen up a lot more around her. She smiled more and she even laughed. Before then, Sara had been very reserved and almost standoffish sometimes. But as they grew closer, even though it was only as colleagues, Sara opened up more.

And Tegan was happier than she had been in, well, years, really. Sara made her happy. Seeing Sara and being in her presence and learning from her brought Tegan a secret joy that lit up her days. She slept better than she had slept in a long time, because she looked forward to waking up. She ate better, and it was making her stronger and healthier. She just… felt better. All the time she felt amazing.

And it was all because of Sara. Sara was her sun and her moon. She had become Tegan's life, and Tegan knew it. She knew that that was a very bad thing. She knew that she or Sara could be restationed at a moment's notice. She knew that they could get called into battle, or ambushed, or bombed. She knew that dangers of falling for someone in her line of work. But she couldn't stop herself. Every time she saw Sara smile, or heard her steal the attention of men twice her size with the power of her voice alone, or watched her work studious at her desk, Tegan fell more in love.

She only wished she didn't have to hold back her feelings. She knew that even if by some miracle Sara was still interested in her, they could never be together. It was completely against regulation for an officer to be in a relationship with a subordinate, especially one that was under her command. It could get Sara fired, and Tegan would never want that. So for the time, she was willing to settle for spending every day working for Sara.

It was a Friday night, and Sara was pretty sure everyone was in their tents drinking. She knew for sure that the few Sergeants would be together drinking. There were six of them in camp, and one of them had gotten some beer shipped in. Sara chuckled to herself as she listened to uproarious laughter coming from some corner of the camp. Normally she would feel compelled to go out and calm everyone down and send them to their bunks, but she was in a good mood.

Mostly because she had a private dinner with Tegan just a few hours earlier. They had never done anything like that before, but Sara had made an exception because they had a lot of paperwork to go over. A shipment of supplies was coming through their camp, and Sara was responsible for making sure all the right supplies went out to the right convoys. That took a bit of coordinating, and she wanted Tegan's help.

It helped that she would get some time alone with Tegan. They had talked a lot while Tegan was in her tent. They talked about Tegan's family. How her mom wrote to her all the time, and Tegan rarely had time to reply. They talked about how Tegan had gotta into some trouble in high school and got sent to military school.

Tegan had tried to get Sara to talk, but all she managed to saw was that she had gone to officer training school straight out of high school and had been in the Army ever since. Tegan didn't seem to mind talking though. Sara just kept smiling. She loved Tegan's voice. It was so rich and full. It was smooth and comforting. Sara wished she could listen to Tegan talk forever.

She shook her head, bringing her thoughts back to the present. Tegan was probably with few other sergeants drinking. Sara grinned. She hoped Tegan was having a good time. She needed a break from all the extra work she had been doing lately. She was a great help to Sara. That was a big part of why Sara had asked for her help. That and she wanted to be around her.

She tried to stop from thinking about the growing feeling she had for Tegan. But the idea of being able to sit around and talk with Tegan all day wouldn't leave her mind. She wondered what it would be like to walk down the street, hand in hand, with Tegan. Maybe stop at a coffee shop or bookstore. Sara thought that Tegan was somebody that she might be able to open up to one day if she was given the opportunity. But that would never happen, she reminded herself. She had to keep it cool, keep it professional.

But that was getting harder and harder as every day passed.

Tegan stopped at three beers, which was almost nothing by army drinking standards. She could tell the other guys were getting wasted. She liked them all. She had spent a lot of time with most of them. But she wasn't really comfortable with getting super drunk with any of them. Not with all the stories of woman getting assaulted by other soldiers.

She was having a good time, laughing with the other sergeants. She liked hanging out with them when they weren't on duty. Well, except for one guy, Sergeant Carter. He was kind of creepy, and Tegan could tell he was really drunk. He was standing kind of away from the rest of the group, and Tegan was pretty sure he was working on his sixth or seventh beer. But that was his choice. As long as he stayed cool, it was none of her business.

After hearing some more jokes, battle stories, and tales of the girls waiting for them at home, Tegan decided it was time for her to get back to her tent. She looked at her watch, and it was already past 0200. She knew Sara would be expecting her to be on duty as usual in the morning, and she would need sleep if she was going to be able to help with convoys that were coming in tomorrow.

She told the rest of the guys she was gonna head out and waved as she walked through the sand to her tent. She knew she'd pass Sara's tent on the way to hers, and she considered stopping in to say goodnight. She shook her head, though, knowing that that was just the beer talking. She couldn't do that. It would be too forward.

Suddenly, Tegan stopped, glancing in front of her. There was a shadow over her shoulder that shouldn't be there. She spun around to see what it was.

"Oh, Carter," she said when she saw him. "It's you." She tried to keep her voice steady as he took a step toward her. "What's going on?"

He didn't say anything, he just kept walking toward her. Taken could smell the booze on him, he was so close. She backed up, but he grabbed her arm. Carter was over six feet tall, and he towered over Tegan's small frame. Panic gripped Tegan, strong than the huge hand wrapped around her bicep.

She tried to pull away. "Carter, let me go," she stammered. "Please let go." Never since joining the army had she felt so helpless. She tried to pull away, using her free hand to try to pry his fingers off her arm. But he grabbed her other arm and pulled her body close to his. He stank of beer and sweat. Tegan felt like she couldn't breathe, and her heart was racing. She started to beg, pleading with Carter to let her go.

He let go of one of her arms and grabbed her jaw, silencing her. "Shuttup, dyke," he slurred. With those two words, Tegan knew what he was planning. And she nearly lost her mind.

Sara was just laying down to sleep when she heard voices. Voices outside weren't unusual, but she felt like something wasn't right. The voice was high, and it sounded panicky. Sara felt her stomach sink when she realized whose voice she was hearing. It was Tegan. And she knew that something bad must be happening to make Tegan sound panicked.

She pulled on her boots without thinking and was out of her tent in seconds. She paused, listening for Tegan's voice again. But her ears were met instead with she sharp sound of skin smacking skin, followed by a sharp cry and the sound of a body hitting the ground. Sara's throat tightened and her pulse quickened as she rushed toward the sound. She rushed around the right side of her tent, weaving between the other nearby tents.

"Help!" Sara froze as she heard the cry splitting the night. Tegan needed her, now. She rounded a corner, full out sprinting in the direction of Tegan's cry. That's when she saw them. A huge man straddling a prone body that Sara guessed was Tegan. He had both her hands in one of his, and it looked like he was trying to unbuckle her belt.

Tegan was screaming, "No! Please! Don't do this! Help me! Somebody!"

Sara didn't think. She just sprinted full force toward the man, throwing all her weight into his body. He wasn't expecting her, and she slammed into him so hard that they both flew into the sand. Sara was blind with rage, throwing punches everywhere she could with no thought of her own safety. The man shielded his face with his arms and shouted in pain whenever Sara's fists connected with their target.

Within seconds though, a pair of strong hands grabbed her arms and pulled her off the man. She threw her elbows back, and shouted, "Let go of me, now!" But the hands didn't let go, and she saw that another form was holding on the man she had just been beating. Sara's eyes darted around, searching for Tegan. There she was, lying in the sand, curled up in a tight ball. Sara could hear her sobs over the shouts of her attacker.

Sara pulled away from whoever was holding her and ran to Tegan's side. She collapsed in the sand an immediately pulled Tegan into her lap. Tegan threw her arms around Sara's neck and Sara pulled her close. She rubbed Tegan's back with one hand and brushed Tegan's hair out of her face with the other. Tegan just sobbed and sobbed into Sara's neck. She was trembling, and Sara was pretty sure her face was bleeding. She felt tears running her own cheeks, and she wasn't sure if it was from sympathy, shock, or adrenaline.

Sara paid no attention to anything going on around her, even though three other soldiers had restrained Tegan's attacker and were waiting for her orders. She couldn't break away from the feeling of Tegan in her arms, her shaken body pressed against Sara's. As Tegan cried, Sara knew that what had happened would change things between the two of them. Forever.


	16. Chapter 16

Silent tears were still running down Tegan's cheeks as she sat in Sara's tent an hour after Sara had carried her there. Sara had held her for a long time, just letting Tegan cry into her shoulder. Tegan couldn't wrap her mind about what had happened. She'd never imagined that it could happen. She was walking back, then he hit her and she was on the ground under him. It happened so fast.

But Sara had come to her rescue. Sara saved her from something terrible. Sara was holding her, gently hushing her and rubbing her back, comforting her as best she could. But then one of the sergeants who had taken Carter away came in.

Tegan sat up and pulled away from Sara quickly. But the sergeant didn't look phased.

"Colonel Clement," he said sharply, saluting Sara as she stood and returned his salute. "What do you want us to do with Carter?"

"Take him to the medical wing and keep him in cuffs there. Post a guard for the rest of the night and tomorrow. I'm writing up his discharge letter tonight, and I'll be calling the general in the morning about sending him home."

"Yes, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you, Colonel?"

"Yes, actually. Find Sergeant Quin's cot and bring it in here. I want her to stay here until she's ready. After what happened she needs a place where she feels safe. This way she won't have to walk to her bunk alone. Also, send in a medic. It looks like her lip is going to need stitches." Sara nodded, ushering the sergeant out.

Tegan was taken aback. She didn't expect Sara to offer to let her stay with her. She was worried about walking around camp alone. Just the thought of weaving through the tents in the dark alone…. It sent shivers down her spine.

"I figured you'd want to stay here," Sara said gently, sitting back down next to Tegan. Tegan nodded and let out a shuddering sigh.

"I… I couldn't go out alone." She held back tears, pushing down the memories. She bit her lip, then winced. When Carter had hit her, he busted her lip open and it hurt a lot. She had managed to stop it bleeding, but Sara was probably right about needing stitches.

Tegan watched Sara as she moved to her desk and started typing up a letter on her Army issue laptop. Tegan hadn't realized how strong Sara still was, strong enough to tackle a full grown man twice her weight. But looking at her now, Tegan could see it. The muscles in her forearms flexed under her pale skin as her hands moved across the keyboard. Tegan's gaze ran up her arms to her toned biceps and her broad shoulders. Tegan couldn't stop herself from staring. Her eyes wandered to Sara's neck and all the things she'd imagined doing to that neck.

"Tegan," Sara mumbled. Tegan sat up straighter. She'd never heard Sara say her first name. Sara had always called her Quin. It had been sort of an unspoken agreement between them that they wouldn't use each other's first names. It made things less personal, and at least for Tegan it kept her from getting too attached. But Sara had broken that, and Tegan wasn't sure what to say.

"Yes, sir?" was all she could manage to reply.

Sara whipped her head around and looked at Tegan. She gulped. She hadn't meant to say Tegan's name out loud. She wasn't supposed to do that. She was her superior, she couldn't just throw her first name around like it was nothing. But she had said it, just loud enough for Tegan to hear. It was out there, and now Sara had to give an account for why.

"Um, I… I, uh…." She stammered about, trying to think of something to say beside what she had actually been thinking. What she wanted to say was that she had been scared out of her mind for Tegan when she realized what was going on and that she wanted nothing more than to hold her until Tegan was calm and safe.

Instead she said, "I just wanted to ask if there was anything I could get for you. To make you more comfortable." Bullshit, she thought to herself.

"No, sir. I'm fine, thank you," Tegan replied. It hurt Sara's heart that Tegan had to be so formal around her. But she knew there was nothing else to be done.

"Medic," someone said outside the tent. Both woman jumped a bit, forgetting about stitching up Tegan's lip. Sara called him in, and he got straight to work.

"Lay down, Sergeant," he said gruffly, pulling up a chair to sit so he was leaning over her head at the end of the cot. It was pretty obvious he had been woken out of sleep and wasn't too happy about having to give stitches at 0-dark-thirty. He quickly sterilized Tegan's cheek, preparing to give her a local anesthetic. He gave her a shot quickly, then inspected the cut while he waited for it to kick in.

"Jesus Christ," he mumbled. "I'm surprised you got this stop bleeding. It's pretty damn deep, Quin." Tegan was on the verge of tears again, and she glanced over at Sara. She had turned her chair around to watch what was going on. But when their eyes met, Sara could feel that Tegan needed her. Even with the anesthetic, this was going to hurt.

She got up and sat down next to Tegan on the bed, daring to slip her hand into Tegan's. "Squeeze my hand when it hurts," she excused. Tegan just nodded as she watch the medic thread the stitching needle. She squeezed Sara's hand before he even started, and Sara's heart fluttered. She gently rubbed her thumb over Tegan's knuckles, trying to soothe her pain.

Tears ran down her cheeks as the needle pierced her already tender lip. She shut her eyes hard, focusing on the feeling of Sara's hand in hers. The touch of her calloused thumb, her warm palm in Tegan's. She took deep breaths, trying to calm down.

"Almost done, Quin." Sara's voice broke the silence, her voice comforting Tegan as much as her words. In a few seconds, the medic tied up the last stitch and packed up. Six stitches on the outside of her lip, and two on the inner layer. The medic was gone before Tegan could get out a thank you.

Sara didn't let go of Tegan's hand until the sergeant came back ten minutes later with Tegan's cot.


	17. Chapter 17

AN: This one's a short one guys, but I wanted to give you some resolution. I'm probably gonna be busy the next few days, so there might not be a ton of updates. I hope you'll be patient with me! -LB

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Once Tegan was settled into her cot, finished typing her letter to the general. In the morning, she was calling for a chopper to come take Sergeant Carter to the nearest permanent base to be held until he could be shipped back to the States for the dishonorable discharge Sara was sure he would receive.

When she finished, she turned to look at Tegan. She had fallen asleep, which gave Sara an opportunity to really look at her in a way she hadn't had the chance to before. Tegan had the most beautiful face Sara had ever seen. Her strong jaw and perfect lips, her cute little nose. The way she a whisper of a smile crossed her lips as she slept. Her strong arms, and the fascinating tattoos that adorned them. The way her big personality and her stunning made her seem twice the size she really was. It was enough to send butterflies to Sara's gut and a shudder to her fingers.

Sara had never looked at anyone the way she looked at Tegan. Not even Emy, all those years ago. She soaked in every inch of Tegan, memorizing each line and curve and feature, committing them to memory so when she lay awake at night she could recall exactly what she looked like.

She moved to a chair that was sitting next to Tegan's cot. She gently ran her fingertips over the bruises on Tegan's forearms from where Carter had grabbed her. Sara's thoughts drifted, and she wondered what would have happened if she hadn't heard Tegan's cries. Tegan was so small, and she was scared. And Carter was strong and drunk….

Sara felt her chest tighten as she struggled to hold back tears. She wouldn't have been able to live with herself if Carter had been able to have his way with Tegan. She would never have forgiven herself. She knelt down beside the cot and rested her head next to Tegan. She felt tears running down her cheeks as she sobbed silently at Tegan's side. In that moment, she swore that she would protect Tegan, no matter what. Even if it cost her her job, or her rank, or her life. Tegan would never suffer harm while she could draw breath.

"Sara?" Tegan said groggily. Sara bolted upright, turning away in hopes that Tegan wouldn't see her tears. "What's wrong, Sara?" Sara's heart fluttered hearing Tegan say her name.

Sara cleared her throat. "Nothing," she mumbled. "Just… had something in my eye." She stood up, keeping her back to Tegan as she walked to her cot a few feet away.

"Sara, don't lie to me," Tegan whispered. "What's wrong?" Sara took a deep breath that shuddered as she exhaled. She was going to have to talk about it. She knew Tegan wouldn't let it rest until she did.

When Sara turned to face Tegan, she was sitting up in bed, a look of worry painted on her face. Sara forced a weak smile. "I just… I was just thinking about how… bad I would feel if anything worse had happened to you tonight," she finally said.

Tegan smiled her signature smile and swung her legs over the side of the bed. "But it didn't," she said. She walked over to Sara, daring to pull her into a hug. "It didn't. Because you saved me." Sara felt the tears coming back again as she wrapped her arms around Tegan. This was the first time she had let herself touch Tegan in seven years. She had almost forgotten how their bodies fit together perfectly, how their hearts lined up just right so that Sara could feel Tegan's heart beating against her chest.

"I know," Sara gasped between sobs. "But-"

"No." Tegan pulled back and held Sara at arm's length. "You don't get to think like that. Tonight, you are my hero. Don't beat yourself up over something that didn't even happen." She held Sara close again, placing a gently kiss atop her head.

Finally Sara let go of Tegan and both of them got in their beds, but not before Tegan pulled hers so that there was only a foot of space between them. Tegan reached out her hand to hold Sara's. Sara took hold of it, and they fell asleep that way. They both slept better that night than they had in years.


	18. Chapter 18

AN: Sorry it took me so long to update, guys! I've been busy lately, and when I haven't been busy I've either been distracted or suffering from writer's block. I hope you all enjoy this chapter! -LB

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It was just before daylight. Sara looked at her watch. Nearly 0500. She looked down at her hand, still holding Tegan's. Her eyes wandered up to Tegan's face, eyes closed peacefully in sleep. Her lip still looked pretty rough, and a bruise was starting to show up along her jawline. Her wonderful, strong jawline. Sara couldn't help but admire her beauty. A sudden sadness hit her as she thought again about how terrible it would have been if Carter had been able to have his way with Tegan.

Tears sprung her eyes, and without even thinking she climbed out of her bed and crawled into Tegan's. She had to hold her. She had to feel her heartbeat and ear her breathing to show herself that Tegan was fine, that nothing had happened.

Tegan stirred, and Sara froze. But Tegan didn't wake up, so Sara scooted closer, gently putting one arm around her. She just stared at her, unable to wrench her eyes away from the beautiful woman lying next to her. She glanced down at her lips, and though they were slightly marred, Sara couldn't help but wish she could lean over and kiss them. She knew she was pushing so many boundaries, but she was having trouble caring. Seeing Tegan so broken last night had broken the last straw of restraint she had. She truly, deeply cared about Tegan. And no matter how hard she tried, she would never be able to get away from that.

As she stared at Tegan debating over and over in her mind what the hell she was going to do, Tegan's eyes fluttered open. Sara's heart dropped, and she couldn't move. Tegan stared at her, and Sara couldn't look away. Tegan was going to push her away. She was going to be angry. She'd tell Sara that she needed to get over her feelings, because they could never be together.

But she didn't. Instead, Tegan leaned in the last few inches separating her lips from Sara's and kissed her. It was a gentle kiss, a mere brush of their lips, but it sent sparks shooting through Sara's veins. She couldn't believe what just happened. Instead of questioning it or wondering what would happen if they didn't stop, Sara kissed Tegan back. She pulled her closer, pressing their lips together again. She was gentle, careful not to hurt the stitches in Tegan's lip.

Tegan pulled back and looked at Sara. She didn't say anything, and Sara was worried.

"Sara…" Tegan whispered. "Do you love me?" Sara was dumbfounded. How could she possibly answer that question? How could she admit something so personal, so revealing, to the one person who it would affect the most?

"I…" she stumbled, tearing her gaze away. She couldn't say it. It could ruin them both, and Sara knew it.

"Sara, look me in the eye." When she wouldn't, Tegan lifted Sara's chin and forced her to look at her. "Sara, I need you to tell me. If this is all just an attraction, if you felt bad for me after last night, fine. That's okay. But tell me, please. Because I can't go on hoping for something that isn't there."

Sara's eyes widened. Tegan loved her. She had basically just said it. She was hoping for Sara's love because she didn't want to be the only one in love.

"Yes," Sara whispered. No sooner had the word slipped from her lips then Tegan was crashing her own into them. She ignored the stitches, pouring all of her passion for Sara into the kiss. Sara moaned into her mouth, and Tegan slid her tongue along her lips. Sara let Tegan's tongue in, fighting for dominance. Tegan won, and Sara let her explore her mouth. Tegan found herself falling in love with kissing Sara, and she truly believed if she was given the chance she would never stop.

Tegan rolled Sara under her, pulling her own shirt off. Sara slid her hands up her sides, and Tegan grabbed at the bottom of Sara's shirt. Broke their kiss momentarily to take Sara's shirt off, but then had her lips pressed against Sara's again as soon as it was off. Sara reached for the clasp on Tegan's bra, and once it was undone she slid it off her shoulders. She slide her hands up to cup Tegan's breasts, and Tegan moaned. She rolled her nipples between her fingers and felt them harden immediately.

Sara pulled away from the kiss, squirming under Tegan enough so that she could get her mouth to Tegan's breast. Tegan groaned as Sara licked her breast and nipped at her nipple. She slid her thigh between Sara's, grinding it into her core. Sara's hips buck, and she felt heat building between her legs. She kept her attention on Tegan's beautiful breasts, as Tegan pressed harder into Sara's core, building a rhythm.

Soon, it was too much for Sara. She grabbed Tegan's sides and flipped her over, straddling Tegan's waist. Tegan was surprised, but she didn't have time to think about it much before Sara's lips were attacking hers again. Tegan was so wet. She couldn't believe she was so turned on just from kissing Sara. But she was, and she needed some relief or she felt like she might explode.

"Sara," she moaned. "Please…." She pressed her hips against Sara, trying to get her point across. Sara kissed her chin, then licked up her jaw to her ear.

"Please what?" she murmured, her voice dripping with seduction. "Please touch me," Tegan whimpered as Sara kissed her neck in all the right places. Tegan felt Sara grin against her skin, then suddenly Sara's hand was on her core, pressing against her through her sweatpants. Tegan scrambled to slide them off, and Sara helped, tossing them to the side along with Tegan's boxers.

Sara cupped Tegan, pressing her palm against her core. Tegan moaned. Sara caught Tegan's lips with her own again, as she gently slid her finger up Tegan's slit. She was so wet that Sara had no problem sliding one finger into Tegan. Tegan threw her head back and moaned, but Sara covered her mouth. They couldn't have anyone hearing them or they'd be in huge trouble.

Tegan gasped as Sara pulled her finger out and gently circled Tegan's clit. Tegan lifted her hips to meet Sara's touch. A tremor ran through her body, and Sara could tell she was already close. She slid two fingers into Tegan's pussy, thrusting inside her. It took all the self-control Tegan could muster not to groan out loud. As Sara sped up her thrusts, she used her thumb to press against Tegan's clit.

Tegan could feel herself on the edge already. She thrust her hips up into Sara's had faster, and Sara pounded into her harder and deeper. Tegan arched her back, and she could feel the pleasure waiting to burst in the back of her skull.

With one last thrust, Sara curled her fingers in Tegan and Tegan plummeted into her orgasm. Sara had to press her mouth to Tegan's to keep her from crying out. Sara continued to curl her fingers in Tegan's pussy, pulling out every last wave of pleasure form Tegan's body that she could.

Finally, Sara felt Tegan relax beneath her, and she slowly pulled her fingers out. Tegan quivered and her breathing was heavy as Sara laid down beside her. Sara couldn't wipe the grin from her face. In that moment, she didn't care about her job or about what her superiors would think. All she could think about was how beautiful Tegan was.

"I love you," she whispered in Tegan's ear. Tegan smiled weakly, still worn from her orgasm.

"I know," she replied, just as mourning alarm sounded to wake the camp.


End file.
